Dyson's Air Purifying Headphones Serve Up A Breath Of Fresh Beats And That Funky Bane Vibe

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Do you live in a constant state of fear? Are you terrified of the world around you? Someone who'd really rather stay home, yet must venture out into the horrifying real world? First, make sure you remember your Xanax. Once that's taken care of, check out Dyson's new "Dyson Zone" wearable air purifier and headset.

The "Zone" is Dyson's first wearable product, and it promises to help you both tackle toxins in the air as well as protect your precious hearing from the ravages of urban society. It's exactly what it looks like: a pair of high-end over-ear noise-reducing headphones combined with a compact air purifier.

It would be easy to assume that this wearable device is an attempt to cash in on Coronavirus hysteria, but you won't find a single mention of the disease (or any disease) in Dyson's marketing. Instead, the firm says the Zone has been in development for over six years, and that it took more than 500 prototypes to develop the Zone.

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Six of the apparently 500-plus prototypes for the Zone.

Essentially, both earcups contain tiny air compressors that force air through filters and then pass that filtered air into the wearer's nose and mouth. Curiously, the purifier portion is actually described as a "non-contact" visor; there is an air gap between your own air holes and those on the headset. This is apparently to avoid irritation that can be caused by continued skin contact. Dyson assures potential purchasers that the air flow is resistant to "crosswinds" in some manner or another.

Actually, the purifier is primarily tasked with processing out pollutants. The manufacturer specifically mentions "particles from sources such as brake dust, industry combustion, and construction," but we wonder if the contactless purifier would meet the stringent requirements for breathing protection in such industrial environments. Dyson's media doesn't show blue-collar workers wearing it, so we suspect not.

Even though significant portions of the purifier mechanism are actually in the headphones, the Dyson Zone's purifier visor is detachable, and snaps on to the headphone portion magnetically. Said headphone portion is Dyson's first-ever audio product, and the company makes some bold claims about its efforts in the arena of audiophile-grade sound reproduction.

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It's a big headset... for you.

Unfortunately for this news story, none of those claims include any numbers. The company's representatives says that the audio from the headset offers "a wide frequency response, precise left-right balance, and distortion significantly below what can be detected by the human ear." Fair enough. Headphone audio is a well-explored science at this point, so we have no real reason to doubt them at their word.

There's probably a big market for this product among wealthy urbanites around the world, but the biggest barrier to adoption may simply be the way it looks. There's no way around it: wearing this thing makes you look like Batman's bodybuilding nemesis Bane. It looks silly, and as practical as it may be, that's enough to kill a useful product. Just look at Google Glass.

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The Dyson Zone fortunately doesn't include experimental combat drugs, as far as we know.

This is just a product announcement, for now; Dyson hasn't revealed pricing for the Zone yet. The brief does say, however, that the purifying headphones will be available by Autumn of this year.