You Can't Make This Stuff Up, 'Goat Simulator' Is A Real Game Available Now For Pre-Order

Show of hands, how many of you have always wanted a goat simulator? Anyone? Right -- neither did we, until we saw that it was an actual thing, and now we can't wait to play it. In fact, that's how this nonsense came to be. For the record, Goat Simulator was never meant to be a real game, it was just a silly bit of code that spilled out of the brains of the programming staff at Coffee Stain Studios. But then the Internet caught a glimpse of the rough simulator and viewers unanimously agreed that this had to happen. And so it has.

Goat Simulator is exactly as it sounds -- you're a goat and you run around doing naughty goat-like things. Judging by the trailer, you also have the ability to defy physics for more goat mayhem than you thought possible. We're talking giant leaps off of trampolines with some crazy acrobatics. When it comes down to it, though, the real fun is wreaking havoc on humans. Check it out:

If you don't find the idea of a goat chasing humans with an axe stuck to his elongated tongue a must-play experience, there's something wrong with you. Or us, we haven't decided. Either way, it's something you can do in Goat Simulator, because why wouldn't the developers include a lick feature?

Goat Simulator Screenshot

The Internet isn't always right, but this time, it was -- this simply had to happen, and it is happening. If you're as excited as we are, you can pre-order your copy for $9.99, which gets you access to the game (via Steam) three days before its release.

If you're on the fence and/or still don't understand why this is awesome, perhaps this will clear it up: